Whatever happened to playing?
Google 'adult toys'. Go on, I dare you.
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Of course you're not going to because you know what you'll find: sex toys. And that's fine but it's also very telling that these are the main 'toys' available to adults. As we grow up, we just stop playing. Think about it, when was the last time you played just for the fun of it?
​I realised this when one day my therapist gave me a homework assignment to 'simply play' that week. I looked at her like a deer in headlights. Play? I don't have kids so I have no socially acceptable reason to be on a playground. I don't like board games. I have no toys. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to play it’s just that when someone said: 'go play' I had absolutely nothing I could do.
Now, don't get me wrong, there was plenty of creative things I could produce. I could knit a scarf, paint a picture or write a story but all these things are productive. I am doing them to create something – not for the sake of doing them themselves. I think that is at the heart of play.
What is play, really?
To really understand what we're talking about we have to define play.
Play is any activity engaged in for its own sake and characterised by curiosity, imagination and enjoyment.
​There's lots of study and research going on out there, not the least by the National Institute for Play and Lego who produced a 2020 UK survey with some eye-opening findings:
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59% of adults reported they don't play enough
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17% couldn't remember the last time they played
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70% of parents surveyed said they had forgotten how to play as adults
At some point, play stops resonating with us. There is no space for it in adult life. There’s no recess or spaces where we are expected or encouraged to play. Add to that the fear of looking ‘childish’ or ‘foolish’ and not having any time. I mean, we barely have time for all the grown-up things we've crammed in our lives how the heck are we supposed to find time to play?
Let's play
It almost goes without saying that playing as adults improves our lives. It helps us better cope with stress, adversity and improves our life satisfaction. It releases all those juicy hormones that make us happier - endorphins, dopamine, and oxytocin. It can make us more creative, even more productive.
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But I would encourage you not to play for these reasons. Don’t play for an outcome, play for the joy of having something with no outcome, no achievement, no success.
Play because you like playing.
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If you’re waiting for permission, here it is.
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Go play. Have a look and the types of play below and you'll find all sorts of ideas of play. Pick the one that sounds the most fun and discover more. There may be some links to purchase but also lots for free so that you can rediscover the joy of playing.
